Prime advice I've found, copied, and pasted for your viewing pleasure, and it will save you the therapy/self-help book money.


1. Stop Being a Dick

Seriously. Just stop. Even when other people are being dicks. Just stop.

When you get a reaction from strangers, they’re not actually reacting to you. They’re reacting to some stereotype and set of assumptions about who you are based on how you look, how you carry yourself, and the kind of person they are expecting to bump into in their current situation. So whatever it is they just did, whatever it is that you think was some great offense to your person, just let it go. It’s not worth escalating the situation, because you aren’t going to get anything positive out of the situation, and you’re just ruining everyone’s time. So leave strangers alone.

As for everyone else, you’ve got even more reason to stop being a dick. If someone says something that you don’t like, yelling isn’t going to accomplish anything except grating on everyone else around you. Oh, sure, you may get them to shut up. You may even intimidate them to admitting you’re right or taking back what they said. But they didn’t mean it, and if they cared or had the guts, they’d still be standing up to you. And as soon as you leave the room or they think you won’t notice, they’ll go back to being exactly they way they were before you yelled at them. Congratulations, you’ve done nothing by being a dick except make everyone regret that you were invited to the party. So how about you stop being a dick?

2. Stop Whining

Look, everything you might want to whine about falls into one of two camps: either you can do something about it, or you can’t. If you can do something about it, then put the energy you were going to put into whining into actually fixing it. If you can’t do anything about it, then your whining isn’t going to do anything except continue your cycle of self-loathing and make you a general downer. Reality isn’t going to change because you whined at it, so deal with the life you have, not the one you want. Whining is counter-productive to everything you want to accomplish. Save your energy and use it to find a hobby instead.

3. Get Out, Get Some Exercise, Unplug, and Deal with Real People

If you’re in your house all the time, surrounded by your own hand-picked decorations and designs, and you go out only when insulated by your iPod’s earphones and something to be burying your eyes in, the it’s no surprise you’re unhappy. Human beings are social creatures. That means you will be a lot happier if you socialize. And, y’know what’s really weird? Most people won’t think you’re anything other than friendly if you strike up a conversation.

We’re also creatures of nature and built for movement. Being surrounded by neon and advertisements has been scientifically proven to make you unhappy, so get into nature and go for a walk. Discover a local park. It’s a bigger deal than most people give it credit for.

4. If People Are Treating You Like Crap, Then Let Them Go

There are lots of people out there who aren’t listening to #1 (”Don’t be a Dick”). They, for some reason or another, are out to bully you, to passive-aggressively control you, to tell you that you are wrong, to use you as a punching bag (verbally or otherwise) and to generally be a problem. So let them go. Stop hanging out with them, and put plenty of distance between you and them. No matter what that person might say, you know that you don’t deserve what they’re dishing out, so pick up your dignity and hit the road.

There are 7 billion people on the world. You can afford to not hang out with that one again.

5. Your Critics Are Always Right

If someone seriously says that you are some way — if they tell you you’re embarrassing to be around, or if they compare you to someone you hate, or if they say you’re not a very nice person, or whatever — then you are that way. You may not be that way in the core of your being, and you may not want to be that way, and it may be a surprise that you have come off that way, but their perception of you is valid, and you need to accept and deal with that. What did you do that made them think that was true? Where are they coming from with their experience of you that made it seem accurate? Ask yourself (and them) these questions, and see if you can take it as an opportunity for self-improvement.

Don’t do what most people do, which is to take it as an attack that needs to be responded to with anger and yelling. Then you’re just taking an opportunity to make yourself better and replacing it with an opportunity to hurt a your relationship with them.

Now, of course, you need to be sure they’re serious: something said in the middle of a fight or said flippantly doesn’t really qualify. So you need to be sure they’re serious. But if your critic is serious, then your critic is right.

6. Do Hard Stuff for a Change

For some reason, our society tries to ask as little as possible from you. Don’t let it.

It’s hard to make a new friend. It’s hard to vest yourself in a job, or in a project, and to really start to care about it. It’s hard to fight for your career, and to do what needs to be done to advance it. It’s hard to get out of your comfort zone and experience things or listen to people that are totally foreign. It’s hard to demand your dignity, it’s hard to submit to humility, and it’s hard to focus on self-improvement instead of self-destruction.

But, if you do those things, you’ll be happier for it. Take the hard road: that’s where the good stuff is.

7. Let Stuff Go/Suck It Up

Most things aren’t worth the effort we put into them. We get angrier about them than they’re worth, we worry more about them than they’re worth, and we generally ruin ourselves over pittances. Let it go. Not a huge fan of where people are going to lunch? Suck it up and go with them anyway. Try something different. Still angry about something someone said to you years ago? Let it go: the reality is that they probably don’t even remember it. Whatever it is that you’re all hung up on that’s been ruining your decade, just let it go. It’s seriously not worth the effort you’re putting into it.

Along this same vein: you can’t control everything, so don’t try. Let it go. Have some confidence in yourself: you’ll find a way to deal with it — whatever “it” is — when you get to it. Human beings are wonderfully adaptable creatures, and there have been others who have found ways to deal with worse than you will ever see.


There ya go. Hope you're happy.

AAARRRRGH!! TNE reports are hording my friends-list!

I'm at RIT in a random mac lab. My computer has been working in Safe Mode, but who knows how long that will last? I've got Compaq sending me a new hard drive, as well as restore disks.

I just got word that Jhonen Vasquez is putting up some human meat stains (tattoos) of his honor. Mine's on there. It's blurry (I think I took it with Evan's web cam?) but fresh. I forgot I sent that to him. I did that when Sean got his first tattoo, about 5 years ago, I think :) Jhonen wrote back, "I am forever on your leg. How perverse."
Mine's the one called "jhonentattoo." Look and marvel! Or if you ask me, I'll just pull down my sock and flash you my sexified ankle.

Sweet.

I devoured three books this week.

1. Chuck Palahniuk's Snuff. Chuck delivers a decoy twist, but really, it's a side plot. The second half of the real twist is a bit predictable, and the end is something funny that I didn't see coming. I'd like to see them try to turn this into a movie!

2. The Invention of Hugo Cabret, by Brian Selznick. Described as not exactly a novel, and it’s not quite a picture book, and it’s not really a graphic novel, or a flip book, or a movie, but a combination of all these things. It's a fantastic story about an orphan, an automaton, and Georges Méliès, who made the world's first sci-fi movie called A Trip To The Moon and introduced a new world of movies to the screen.

3. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, by F. Scott Fitzgerald. I had described it to Charles as being just like the episode of Mork and Mindy where Mork gives birth to an old man who ages backwards. And Charles said, "Say no more! I saw a preview for a movie with Brad Pitt that I thought was a total rip-off of that episode!"
The book was bittersweet, and of course, sad at the end. It's strange how everyone around him denied his condition, but understandable. Everyone fears growing old, and nobody likes saying a final farewell to an infant. But nobody let on that they believed it, even though it was happening to Benjamin right before their eyes. How isolating it was.

My next book is Freaks, by Annette Curtis Klause.


I didn't get this cover. I wish I had, though. It makes me fall in love.

I went down on the couch last night to calm my stomach. Maybe it was my stomach. I can only hope. I did have a garbage plate earlier, but I can handle them. Always.
I rested my head down with my hair dangling off the edge, dancing in the breeze of the fan, and I was lulled to sleep by the monotonous voice from the television telling me all about Eleanore Roosevelt and her relationship with her father. I was dreaming of being 15 years old with her and we were taking care of a very large mental patient who somehow was learning to kiss with tongues on the lap of little Nell. And I turned away to fetch an orderly and when I turned around again, the orderly and I were watching Nell get raped, arms bound in one of his hands, raised above her head, her face on the floor, and her naked body pressed firmly under him, dorsal. There were white gauze fabrics placed like the hair on the portrait of Venus, and she wasn't struggling, crying, or calling out. She looked angry, but docile.
When the voice outside my head had told me that Eleanore's father had died, that the last time she saw him was walking into a bar, telling her that he'd be out in a few moments and to wait for her, I woke up. I was under the impression that we were listening to the tale of Cindy Brady, because the actress that played her had just died. That's what I thought before consciousness came back completely.

So, since I took a nap, I tossed and turned all night until about 6am, when my next adventure involved me driving a small red car through several towns with their own quirks. One had buildings made of giant stones, all smoothed into buildings, not like Aztecs or Mayans, but dark, slate-like rocks, and they all had stairs leading up to them. The roads were covered in ashes, and the next town was white, but not white, because it was really clear. All the buildings and houses here were made of glass. I stopped to use the toilet in one of them. You couldn't see inside, except through the windows, even though it was all glass, except the steps, which were metal grates, like in a factory.
Someone had moved my car when I came out. A big truck with a familiar hick inside. Brown hair, shaggy, and a smile that looked devious yet fun on a full face with apples in his cheeks. He was tailing me through all the towns. I wonder why. But, I will never find out, because now I'm awake, stretching my whole body across an empty bed.

Human Egg Makes Accidental Film Debut

They've finally caught ovulation on tape! The video is creepy, but not as creepy as the pictures. Ugh... looks like a harlequin baby's eyes.

Well, I'm going to go have lunch. Bye bye.



PS: GO GO GEORGE TAKAI!!! He was the first to get married in West Hollywood :)
http://www.boingboing.net/2008/06/17/george-takai-and-bra.html

When are Zach and Evan getting married?
;)

My computer is fixed. I just have to reinstall EVERYTHING.
I managed to save the better half of my iTunes folder, and my Dionysos music was saved, too!

Unfortunately, all my writings were not saved. This includes the first issue draft of IMJH, and my novel-in-progress. I'm kinda pissed about that. IMJH, I printed a while back, but the novel is gone forever.


On the bright side, being without a computer made my apartment quite clean! And I wasn't too late to put my two cents at Whitechapel, regarding the most hilarious installment of FreakAngels yet.


How've you all been?

I've recently become obsessed with Dionysos, a wonderful French band that covers a full spectrum of sounds. I do happily own their album La Mécanique du Coeur, which I've heard several times in a row now.

I so verily want their book of the same title but have no moolah to ship overseas.


Also, on the subject of cool French books, I would LOVE to get a hold of the graphic novel Clues, thats production I've been following on the artist's blog for some months now.





... my birthday's coming up :)

Here's a video for you to enjoy...

Tais Toi Mon Coeur - Dionysos Feat. Olivia Ruiz
by allcurious

I've discovered two very addicting games that has kept me in front of the computer as if it were WoW.

1. Amateur Surgeon, found in Adult Swim's game section. I made it to File 3 only to be foiled by the clock on the first guy.
and
2. PMOG. Found on a steampunk community. It turns the entire internet into one big game, and I have already discovered some beauty I had not yet seen before, including an amazing French band Dionysos who have great music, and gorgeous videos (especially the animated one Tais-toi mon coeur which came from their latest album La Mécanique du Coeur (which I now own), thats entirety is a story about a boy with a heart so cold that a witch replace it with a clockwork one. Anyway, check out the video in the marked section. It's so catchy, and sad.

Go to PMOG if you love surfing the net and sign up. It's so much more interesting than just idly surfing out of boredom. You are certain to find something that interests you.


In other news, the sale at Threadless has ended, and I've collected my spoils...

( nine tshirts to add to my closet! )

Offered myself up for a tagging from Kura.

1. Reply to this post and I'll assign you a letter.
2. List (and upload, if you feel like it) 5 songs that start with that letter.
3. Post that to your journal with these instructions.

...brought to you by the letter H.

What a task to only pick 5! I took all my favourite H songs and narrowed it down to what YOU should hear.

Hakkuruberinokoi by Raphael
Heartbreak And Razorblades by Miss Derringer
Hello Kitty Makes A Band by Lullatone
How To Play Your Internal Organs by Stereolab
Hell Bent by Kenna

And an extra for good measure (because he likes to be a consolation prize. That's how he got this loser).
Happy Turtle Mix by Gaffeizil

The end.

I desperately want to go and see London via this marvel. Anyone want to ride me down to Brooklyn?

Hell yeah!

I finally have a rad, working webpage that doesn't take a million years to load! Woots!

Mah booooooyyyyfriennnnd helped.

http://www.honeyinmygears.com

Whole new look :)

Still need to add a few things, but the point is, it works like science, and is pretty (pretty boring, hahaha!)

Sweet!

PS: found ONE bug in Firefox.... when you hit Journal, and it shows the top bar, it's missing the link called 'diary' but for some reason, it works just fine in Internet Exploder.

I saw The Strangers with my dad yesterday... poor guy paid full price for both of us. I told him I was going to wait for the dollar cinema to see it, but he wanted to see it now.

When it was done, we both agreed that it sucked like a snaggletooth'd whore (um... I didn't verbalize that feeling, but I think we would agree that's how much it sucked).

PLOT IS KEY, people!

!!!PLOT!!!

I thought I had it all figured out at the beginning...

Liv Tyler doesn't want to marry Mr. Cool Guy because she 'just isn't ready.'
Knock knock. Hey the light doesn't work on the porch and for some reason the light from inside the house isn't shining on your face either, little miss Stranger. And she says, "Is Tamara here?" "no." "You sure?" And she peeks over at Liv Tyler who looks like she's going to open her mouth to release a bunch of bees to murder the girl if she doesn't get the hell out of here lickety split. "Okay. See ya later," says the girl.

And here's where I get it all figured out...

Liv Tyler must be this Tamara girl, and maybe she doesn't want to marry Mr. Cool Guy because she, I don't know, might expose this other persona, and maybe her little friends are angry at how she abandoned them and her old life, and wants maybe to seek revenge. Or maybe Mr. Cool Guy orchestrated this whole thing and he knows she's Tamara and she's led a horrible double life and he wants her dead.

Nope.

None of that.

Here's where I spoil it, so if you still want to see it, skip the rest of this entry.

This movie is about a couple of people who come home, then some other people come to terrorize and kill them. Then they do.

The end.

Worse than the first Hulk movie.

Warren Ellis and I share some of the same brain juice:

"Well, I guess the countdown to Obama's assassination starts now."

The biggest reason for my wanting Clinton in office was because this nation has more vigilantes that would take out aggression on a black man than they would on a white woman. My guess is that he won't last through his acceptance speech, should he become president.

I'm not one for politics, in any way, so I cannot continue typing without help conveying my thoughts.

Cheers.

Threadless is having yet another sale! And I just got three bitchin' tees!

( these bad boys )

1. Rented Vidocq. Bloody brilliant film with amazing effects and a fantastic storyline, and I did not see that twist. Really. I thought I had it all figured out, and then BAM something completely off the wall. The only bad part was that it was widescreen but cropped to the tv screen, so the edges were cut off. No way to fix that. Also, the special features (except the trailer) were in French sans subtitles, and I barely understood it. I really want to see the FX documentary with subtitles. Still quite capital none the less.

2. Rented The Orphanage. Didn't see that one coming, either, but it all fell together in the end. I did predict a lot of parts, including the boons in the end. I loved the references to Wendy from Peter Pan. Haven't gotten to the special features yet.

3. FINALLY finished reading Coin Locker Babies, by Ryu Murakami. It was nearly 400 pages with size 10 font and minuscule leading, and got rather boring in parts just before the most exciting parts happen, so you get a good running start, then slow down, and then get a second wind a few times. It ended rather abruptly, though. I would have liked some kind of follow up on the lives of the two main characters after they'd finished their stories.

4. Started reading Snuff, by Chuck Palahniuk. I think he started a new trend in his books, beginning with Rant, where the story is told by a number of characters, rather than one of them, or a narrator. I'm only three chapters in, so I have nothing else to say yet.

5. Bought Steampunk today. Haven't opened it yet though.

6. Thinking of getting Irvine Welsh's latest book Crime, which comes out in August, but it's a continuation, or a spin-off, of Filth, which I rather disliked.

7. Who gave out my email address? My fawndolyn yahoo account? Because I just got HORDED with spam, and not the strangely tasty or arousing kind, either. For reals, people. My fawndolyn account was untainted for years, and now my bulk mail box is filling up with crap. Nuts to whoever did it. Nuts, I say!

8. It is so very warm. I love it!

9. Ruby Tuesdays is a mistake. Their food (except the asian dumplings) were unsatisfying. And RIDICULOUSLY overpriced. Kelly and I only went because Olive Garden next door was packed and the queue was spilling out the door all over the parking lot...

10. ...which turns out to be the exact reason why Summer, my best friend from middle school and parts of high school went to Ruby Tuesdays, too. We were so excited to see each other that we wouldn't let each other go when we hugged. I can't believe I saw her! It's been 8 years! Last time I saw her, her daughter was still in a baby stroller. She's grown into an adorable little girl, and Summer got SO THIN (not grossly unhealthy thin, but she used to be my weight). I felt bad because I kinda left Kelly in the dust (she's never really been friends with any of my friends). But we exchanged numbers and I'm SO going to call her :)

First of all, TESS FREAKS OUT HELL YEAH!!!
Second, I got Chuck's latest book Snuff.
Third, got City of Ember (the first of the Books of Ember) in prep for the coming movie which looks awesome.
Fourth, I steampunked myself all cute yesterday and went out to take pictures at this abandoned laundry factory downtown. We got halfway there and I started looking for my camera only to find that there was no camera. Had I left it home? Did it fall out in mom's car? Or *GASP* did I leave it up north like I did my mobile charger? We went anyway, and I explored the buildings, cursing my lack of camera the whole time, but really enjoying the view. Charles got a photo from his mobile, which turned out as okay as a mobile image can turn out. I called mom and she ransomed my camera which indeed was in the back seat. I offered her Charles, but she didn't take him. The end.

• 14:35 "Surprise! We'll be on set ALL DAY" is not what my uterus and ONE emergency tampon wanted to hear. Yay for an all-black costume.


• 22:57 A cornucopia of curse words! Left my mobile charger in the mountains. Goodbye Twitter. Hello eBay. Also, hello sandwich. Goodbye sandwich.

End transmission.