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You Were Right

You were right. It's not over between us. But it is a pause in our friendship. The medication is less and less affective on him, and so all he can see in me is evil. He can't tame that feeling, so he escapes from it. Charles talked to him for me. They talked for a half-hour, and came back with the news that this is not the end. It's a pause. a step back. A retreat for space. I don't have to find a new place to hang out after work, and I don't have to avoid him either. He's encouraged me to say hi when I see him. I'm a little sad his unmedicated mind sees me this way, but I'm glad there's still a part of him who wants me as a friend still.

I just hope he knows that I knew the medication's waning would do this to us, but the real wrench in the works that freaked me out was him bagging up all the things I gave him and dumping it on my porch without a note or a word or any sign that we're not over. That has a different context to people without schizophrenia.

Comments

( 1 comment — Leave a comment )
prinzessbtrfly
Sep. 27th, 2015 05:27 pm (UTC)

*hugs* this has to be hard to deal with

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