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July seems to be going pretty well so far! Saved the best news for last, so if you wanna skip the boring stuff...

Skating Wipe-Out!.
I still like skating, and I'm strengthening my weak points and finally getting better at spins, and learning some backwards tricks, but it's less fun when there's nobody to skate with. Even Charles doesn't like it when it's just us. But at least I wasn't totally alone when I had the wipe-out of my life!

I was working on a 2-foot twizzle (where I rotate around mid-glide so I'm gliding backwards, but in the same direction) in the middle of the rink (someone else was hogging the boards where I'd otherwise be practicing - much safer). I almost got it, but had no idea how to "stick the goddamn landing," as Chalen says, and I fell straight backwards. Landed first on my left ass-meat, then kept plummeting back til I full-bodied the ice. My glasses went flying. My phone, which was in my pocket, went flying. I was not in any way hurt, but three people rushed to surround me. People aren't generally worried when people wipe out on the ice. I've fallen plenty of times, often on purpose in order to show newbies how to fall properly without injury (earlier that afternoon, in fact, Charles asked if I'd ever fallen backwards. I said I haven't, and I don't intend to do it on purpose. Just protect your head). I did nothing to protect my head because it all happened SO fast! So fast that I didn't even scream or have time to be afraid of the fall. One second, I fucked the landing, and the next, I'm flat on the ground trying to reach for my glasses and phone! It was exciting! But everyone told me they saw me smack the back of my head hard on the ice. Huh? No, I didn't hurt my head at all. I was wearing my hair in a bun, though. I'm guessing that broke my fall. I have a lot of hair now, so the bun was pretty cushion-y. At the end of the day, I wound up with a sore elbow (cuz apparently I smacked that too), and a big old softball lump on the side of my ass that made it impossible to sleep on my side. And now I'll never not wear a bun while skating again.

Chalen, who'd been helping me at the beginning of all this (the one I had a superb crush on), is full of mood swings, and although he seemed eager to share extremely difficult and personal details of his past (welcomed, certainly, better out than in, I always say), he seems to shy away when I offer my friendship-shoulder to lean on, and doesn't really talk to me much anymore. He's even spending less time with Niki, and he's a bit more officially her coach! She doesn't seem too worried about it, though. He talks to me on occasion online, and he's very sweet. I just don't want him to be another friend I'm not realizing doesn't actually like me. Depression Brain keeps me paranoid like that. I also found out the mayonnaise I've been eating has soy in it, so that's been driving my brain bonkers, too. I guess I should start on the meds again to flush it out...

The Dumb Diet Section
I've been stuck toggling between 207 and 214 pounds for months now, so I decided to take drastic action.

First, I did a 3-day "Fat Fast" where 80-90% of my calorie intake came from fat sources. Macadamia nuts, eggs, chicken skin, mayonnaise, sour cream, and cream cheese. All good fats, but so much of it every day - but weirdly also not? An average day of the fat fast would be about 5 "meals" consisting of ONE of the following items: bulletproof coffee (coffee with butter and coconut oil blended in it - I also add heavy cream), 1oz macadamia nuts, 2oz cream cheese, 1oz chicken with 2oz mayo, 4 slices of bacon, 2 egg yolks (went with whole eggs) and 2tbsp mayo (I switched that to sour cream after that first shot - ugh), 2oz sour cream with 1/2 cup of cucumber (I switched that to mayo and added pepper), and I tossed in some fat-heavy cured meats if I needed an extra snack. But it was mostly very filling. And it sorta worked! I got down to 206 lbs!

And then I stayed at 206 for annoyingly long before I made my next drastic move: Intermittent fasting (IF). IF is when you only eat in a small window of time and fast the rest of the time. I chose an 8-hour window between noon and 8pm. I'm mostly not starving, like I thought I would be! I'm a little hungry right now, but water will sate me til I'm ready for bed. This resulted in the toggle being less abrasive, so instead of jumping around in a 7lb gap, it became more 3 or 4, going between 206 and 210. Still not satisfied.

Last move: Counting out my servings with a kitchen scale and the loseit app (which now tracks macros and not just calories, thank goodness). I also figured out exercising during either fasting periods (or near/during the evening fast) really ramps things up! As of this morning, I'm at 203!

Brexit 1776
I spent July 4th exactly how I wanted to spend it. With Brian, on the hidden street behind the old abandoned hospital with a clear view of the city's fireworks display, drinking expensive bourbon whiskey and smoking to keep the bugs away, on a blanket (so no gravel/grass butt).

The new trailer for seasons 2 and 3 of one of my all-time favourite and short-lived animes in the galaxy was released, and much to my delight and surprise, THE PILLOWS will be featured! They did the music for the original, and that's how most people here learned about them. I fell in love with their music hard! and got every single one of their albums throughout the years. I finally got to listen to the new album, too! Absolutely wonderful, as always.

I binged season 3 of iZombie and loved it (for the most part). The ending was lovely, and I can't wait for season 4.

Started, but haven't caught up with the new Twin Peaks - no spoilers, I'm only on episode 4. HellOOOOOOO!

New Castlevania show is on Netflix, to my surprise. That'll teach me to skip Warren Ellis's newsleters. I haven't started it yet, but it's on the list, and I'm kinda pumped for an R-rated Castlevania written by Uncle Warren.

(hey, that's me!)
I finally made a new website apart from Honey in my Gears (dot com). It's Fawndolyn dot com and it's my new precious commodity. The old site had all of my art that I'd upload whenever I had enough pieces to warrant an update, and it was kind of a mess. I had a lot of sections and sub-sections, and I just... stuff had to go.

I went through print-outs of my old site and X'd out everything I didn't think represented me anymore. I still like a lot of the work I've done, but my style has changed and I wanted the new site to show my current style, and maybe a style before (I have a very small "other works" section of things I wanted to keep. But like... my oil paintings, my school stuff, my sketches I tried to pass off as finished pieces... that's not what I want people to see. People can see that stuff on the old site, or on my social media. The social media helps, because I can post what I'm working on or something I've finished, and it'll be out there and seen, and if I don't like it when I'm ready to update my site, it can stay on social media and stay off my page. My most recent watercolour, which I spent days creating, is one I love dearly, but I don't think it turned out as amazing as I find my other simpler pieces, so it stays on my FB Like page and my Tumblr, but not in the portfolio.

Apparently, that happens to artists - after they finally think they've achieved GOOD AT ART status, they still can produce crap on occasion ;)

Gonna try to make this one short.
I ended up signing up for that aerial yoga class with my friend Jackie after all. We just got back from the class. I loved it. She hated it. She did fine. Shockingly, I did better. I've been the worst student in any and all aerial classes ever, due to the fact that I have too little upper body and core strength. It's blown me away that I'm actually better at something than one of my friends. I feel bad admitting this, but it's almost nice that I'm better than she is. She's part of my Cup Crew (regulars at open mic night at the Lovin' Cup), and I always feel like the loser of the group because I can't do anything better than anyone. There's drawing, but none of them care about that. I feel bad for the schadenfreude... but.......

Aerial Core kicked my fucking ass SO FUCKING HARD. I may have literally died. You are probably reading the ramblings of a ghost. It was BRUTAL. I have to stick it out because I promised Penny (Niki's best friend and the yoga instructor) I wouldn't drop it like so many others do.

Tomorrow is aerial Barre. I don't know how that'll go, but I'm excited.

Other Crap
I got some fun stuff in the mail (raunchy postcard from Adam, swag from Zombina and the Skeletones, art from Keegan, ipsy bag). I'm doing a 30 day song challenge on my facebook (I'll post here when it's over). I've been putting off doing my laundry for a million years. I'm selling my used panties to panty-sniffer pervs on the internet in exchange for Amazon gift cards (no return address on packaging). I sold another Twin peaks button to someone overseas (nobody local ever buys my stuff). I sewed lace straps to the tongues of my skates so the tongue wouldn't slip. I sewed a shoulder strap to my Wuzzles gym bag. I lost my black flats. I cleaned and re-organized my desk. I am planning two keto recipes. And...

I saved the best for last.

A couple weeks ago, I was told there was an open call for artists to illustrate a book of short stories by a local author. I put my name in. I got a pdf (which I promptly printed). I read the stories. I made three (as per requested, up to three) sketches of three stories (one sketch each). I didn't really have high hopes, but I shot the sketches with my phone, cleaned them up a bit, tacked on my new web address and a quick bio, and sent them off on their due date.

Today, I got a reply. They loved my work. They thought I was best suited for the book. They want me to be the sole illustrator. They want me to do illustrations for two more stories, one of which for the title story, and will also be used for the cover.


Do you know what this means??? OMG.

And the best part? It's a paid gig. $500 ($100 per piece), plus a couple copies of the book.

I'm glowing.


( 4 comments — Leave a comment )
Jul. 11th, 2017 11:46 am (UTC)
Congrats on the commission, that's awesome.
Jul. 18th, 2017 05:03 pm (UTC)
Jul. 16th, 2017 04:03 am (UTC)
Woohoo, congrats on the book illo commission!
Jul. 18th, 2017 05:04 pm (UTC)
Thank you :)
( 4 comments — Leave a comment )